Fuck That

/1 Comment/in /by

The truth is not everyone deserves you; most don’t even come close. This really pertains to all women, but Dommes in particular. However, for some reason, many Pro-Dommes end up in romantic relationships, with these awful guys who oddly enough seem to “dominate” them in every viable sense.

I always wondered why such beautiful, strong women would ever allow any man to disrespect them, let alone their partners. These are the same women who make an incredibly good living off of the fact that they are “Goddesses”. They are worshiped and adored by basically every man on the planet except the one they choose to give their heart to.

I could never really quite grasp the concept of this. I’ll be the first to admit that in my personal life I tend to be initially drawn to men that have some kind of alpha in them, but that really is mostly due to the fact that I like a bit of a challenge. If I can’t break them by the end of the first date, they won’t get a second.

However, I also tend to be drawn to intelligent and intuitive men, most of which innately know better than to cross me. Even in the instance I’m dating someone, if it becomes clear that they don’t value me in the way I deserve, or prioritize me accordingly, regardless of my interest in them, I promptly remind myself that men line up to lick the bottom of boots, and then show them the fucking door.

So anyway, today I’m browsing through my news feed when I come across an article about sex workers. Now, personally, I’ve never consider Domination “sex work” since there is no sex, but according to the ignorant man who found it fundamentally imperative to categorize such jobs, it is indeed sex work.

Ok, so back to the article before I get completely side-tracked and go on a 3-page rant about how the art of domination is about 10 percent physical and 90 percent mental…I’ll save that for another blog. Anyway, so the article was actually quite positive considering that the term “sex work” has such a negative condensation.

It was a pretty lengthy text, but the premise of it was that the reason sex work is looked down upon in such a universal way is due to the stigma perpetuated by males that the female workers accept as truth. The article didn’t really touch on Dominatrix’s, it focused more on traditional sex jobs, such as escorts and strippers. Now, it’s pretty obvious that stripping doesn’t entail sex either, but it is also categorized as such, so just to avoid further side-tracking, let’s just go with it for now.

Nonetheless, the article got me thinking about these beautiful, smart, professional Dommes that I know, that engage in such toxic relationships with such worthless men. I started to think about it in less of a personal regard, and more in sociological terms. We are culturally cultivated to look down on women that use their bodies, or any aesthetic attribute in a way that produces revenue. Yet, we are constantly bombarded with images and expectations we should meet; However, when were fortunate enough to have those attributes, and intelligent enough to monoplolize on that, suddenly we’re whores. And we as women accept this, but why? We’ve been beaten down and manipulated to such a staggering degree that we feed into this bullshit…but fuck that!

And fuck you….to every guy that has ever found it acceptable to mentally or physically demine a woman and blame it on her profession. Fuck you to every “man” that has been intimidated by a powerful woman and in turn made her feel powerless. Fuck you to any man that has ever cut a woman down to size in order to feel bigger. Fuck you the men that are willing to rob a woman of her inner beauty so she can match his own reflection. Fuck you to the insecure men that will break you down in every way possible, so you are forced to become dependent on them. Fuck you to the freeloading losers that will spend his woman’s money while simultaneously slut shaming her. And to all ignorant assholes who are passing judgment, without even having the intellect to comprehend what they are judging.

And fuck you, to anyone that ever makes you feel less then you are…you are nothing short of spectacular. You are beautiful, you are a boss, you are fearless, you are strong, you are a fucking Goddess, and the only thing you should be ashamed about is picking the wrong man, but we all make mistakes. So wipe the mascara from under your eyes, apply that perfect shade of lipstick, put on those boots and strut your sexy ass right on to better things. Keep slaying ladies!

Instinct

/in /by

I couldn’t help myself. I knew better, but the desire to have you was almost animalistic. Of course, I didn’t want you in the way that you want to be wanted. My intentions toward you were something different entirely. It wasn’t enough for me to just have you, I wanted to own you…sounds kind of selfish right?

I couldn’t seem to conduct myself in a non-predatory way; despite my best efforts every time I was in your presence, I could only focus on controlling you. The core intent in every action I made was to seduce you. But I didn’t seduce you in the way you wanted to be seduced…I didn’t want to lure you into my bed, I wanted to force you to your knees.

Now of course this wasn’t your forte, not that I’d ever come right out and ask you. That wouldn’t be fun now would it? Normally I have no problem just relaying my rigorous list of demands and expecting my subject to eagerly comply. However, that wasn’t the case this time. You started to become more of a conquest and less of a person.

I felt guilty. As someone that so strongly advocates the consensual side of play I was ashamed of my actions, but just couldn’t help myself. I had to have you, and it had to be in the way that I wanted it. It wasn’t manipulative or malicious, just primitive. I wanted you to want it, and I knew that if I could just get you in the position to taste it you’d develop a craving. The loss of control I felt over myself only propelled the need to control you.

You wanted me, you made that pretty evident from the beginning. You wanted me in the same way that all men want me; perhaps even something more. You’d always look at me in awe with indescribable admiration. I wanted you to admire me; but not in the way that you did. It made me feel bad.

I had no intention of loving you, of course I’d love you to some extent; the practice of BDSM seems to create that bond. I suppose it’s something to do with the implicit trust. I wanted to share that with you, I wanted you to see how beautiful it really is. How freeing it feels to be owned, but I knew that wasn’t the kind of bond you were looking for.

I was afraid I was going to ruin you, you craved a certain normalcy that I could trump entirely. I just wanted to expand your horizons, and offer you experiences you couldn’t obtain in the past. I wanted to give you something you didn’t know you needed, but I knew if I gave it to you, you would start to fiend for it. I wanted you to have it, but I couldn’t be the one to give it to you.

I’m good at reading people, hearing the words that are never spoken. I knew you in ways you probably didn’t even know yourself. I knew your body without ever exploiting it. I knew you’d easily become addicted, and I’d easily become bored. I also knew you’d easily become hurt, and as bad as I wanted you, I decided to back off completely.

It was easier to resist the urge if I cut off contact with you, and so I did. Several months went by before you finally gave up. After a while I forgot about the urge entirely. I didn’t think about you much at all after that, and I could remember the impulse to own you, but couldn’t remember quite how it felt. Then the other day I’m going through my emails. I notice one, and written in the subject line is, “I need to be controlled.” I open the email, and guess what…it was you.